confession of a bad mom

I did it. I swore as a younger mom I would never utter the words that came from my mouth today. on the way to preschool this morning, van began complaining (again) about a little kid who is constantly hitting him, bumping into him, and punching him. It is not being resolved at school in a way that makes me happy. In my classroom, we call parents and they come pick up their habitual offender. In the preschool class where this occurs, the child gets a treat if he stops after only hitting one or 2 kids... so today, i told van to just hit him back...

I fear i will get a phone call from preschool telling me that this is going on...

VICTORY is being able to say it...

It seems in most families there is one kid who has no luck... In ours, its Jo... from birth, he has struggled with the weirdest health difficulties. Looking back and piecing it together, we realize they are all connected, but everything is clearer in retrospect... At birth, he weighed a whopping 6 pounds. After a few months of slow weight gain, he was diagnosed with borderline failure to thrive and gross motor delay. In his first year of life, he had 7 ear infections and several sinus infections. At 13 months, he had febrile seizures that sent him to the ER 2 times, once he quit breathing. At 18 months, still underweight, he went in for surgery where they put tubes in and took adenoids out, then 3 months later he went back in and had his tonsils out. He was tested at 90% hearing loss and wasn't speaking at all. After years of speech therapy and some movement therapy (which, to Johns chagrin, included ballet classes...) He seems like a normal, healthy and happy child now...

We switched the boys to a new dentist and yesterday was the first appointment. After he had seen all 4 boys, he called me back to his office to discuss each one with him. He immediately put Jo's chart on the bottom and said the concern needed to go last... When we got to his chart, the first thing he told me was that Jo has a shor... (where i interrupted, yes, shortened frenum (Ankyloglossia or tongue tied) , I know) he looked at me and asked why it had never been taken care of. His old dentist told me there was no need for it, and he couldn't do it.... Turns out, this leads to periodontal problems later in life. I knew he had one bc it led to his poor weight gain (he couldn't nurse well), which led to formula, which led to excess ear infections (my nursing babies have NEVER had ear infections...) the ear infections caused the seizures (bc of extreme temp spikes related to infections) , and it spiraled down from there... His speech therapist told us at the end of last year that he was speaking as well as he would ever be able to, and that she would continue working with him, but the r's will prob. never be clear.

On feb. 11th, jo will go in for a quick in office procedure where they will snip and stitch and his frenum will no longer be an issue!!! (and he'll get to eat a ton of ice cream!) the dentist seems to feel that this will help with his speech problems, and I am hoping the r sounds will FINALLY come!

(the frenum is the flap of skin that attaches the tongue to the bottom of the mouth. Jos' comes to the very front of his tongue, causing him to be unable to stick out his tongue very far, or curve it into the shapes to make clear speech sounds)

i need some help! (followed by some adourable pics)

OK- here is a comp. problem that I am having that is causing some major issues...

I have several hundred photos in my Dec. folder. I always just upload them and leave them numbered as they upload (ie. Dec. 2008 359) I never go back and rename the files. The other day, I noticed they had gotten scrambled. so number 1 wasn't anymore, it was like number 24 and it was totally scrambled the whole way down. I moved all the photos around so that they were back in the right number and then double clicked to open them and realized that the images were now scrambled. If I look at Dec. 2008 1, the thumbnail shows me its a picture of Carlos, one of my super cute students. When i double click on the thumbnail, it opens to a picture of my brother kelly on Christmas. Why is this happening, and how do i fix it?? I have never heard of this happening before, and cannot figure out what I did... Ok, thanks! now for some pictures:

CL turned 3 months on the 17th! She shows no sign of losing her hair, loves to sit in her bumbo and loves to watch her brothers do just about anything! (she is also getting FAT! 12 pounds, 4 ounces)

Her hair is still so much fun to play with! She sits so patiently while i fix it, and it makes her look like such a big girl. When i leave her hair down, it gets in her face so I am trying to decide to cut bangs or let it grow...

Finally, I love Stephanie! Here she is holding CL while her super cute boys slept away, unaware that there mother was showing love to another baby... How very dirty of her! thanks for letting us crash your house, we love having you guys living so close!!!

jumping the gun a little bit....

I am still trying to catch up my blogging. not because i think you guys are super worried abt how i spent my new years(looking at pics of friends on facebook), or what my kids got for Christmas (a wii), or any of that jazz, but because it helps me when I go back and scrapbook... so i know that this is jumping the gun on all of that stuff, but i just want to remember this while it is still fresh...

the past week, John and I spent a ton of time rearranging the entire house. we moved all 4 boys downstairs to the "green" room, the second "master bedroom" of the house we are in. that room had previously been the scrapbook/craft/iron pile holder/junk room. Everything from there went to the playroom for the week while we moved everything else around. we turned T and M's old room into an office, and put the bookshelves there, and van and jo room into cl's room. it felt so good to open up space from our main living areas and get CL out of our room ( i am sleeping so much better!)

having a girl has opened up a whole new world here... it may sound silly, but it has given me the chance to try my hand in things i have never tried... I have learned bow making recently, and am having a ton of fun trying different styles, and learning how to do simple things like making clips. It is neat to have new talents develop! This past weekend, I made cl a bow holder. Each of the kids have a monogram initial above their beds with their name stamped on it. I went a little further with hers, and am really pleased with how it turned out. It makes me want to go back and redo the boys and make theirs a little more fun. I also for the first time fixed cls hair before church this morning. She wears clips everyday to keep her bangs out of her eyes, but there are some really fun blogs i stumbled across like this one and this one that I love looking at, and they link to tons more each... its like an art form, and while i don't think i could ever see myself spending that much time on her hair, i remember sitting at my moms feet many mornings while she pulled my hair into a french braid or curled it in rollers for Easter and Christmas time. I remember how loved I felt as she spent time on that, and can totally see the drive behind it. I had a really good time fixing her hair this morning, and she smiled and cooed the whole time i played with her hair, it was really nice! When i finished, T announced that she looked hideous. I can see where he is coming from, without any hair in her face, she looked extremely fat and round! I do think hideous was taking it a bit far, though! I call them tiny messy buns... the rubber bands are the tiny ones you buy at the store, and then I threaded a black button through each band before putting her hair up.... I learned that from one of those talented above mentioned moms! I was really proud of myself, and think that i will try more tomorrow, but in the back (she has enough for 2 piggies in the back already!!)

on a side note... van has been "difficult" lately. i am sure it is a result of cl taking over his baby position, and hes not mean... just difficult. For example... he wanted to do something, i don't even remember what it was now, but he had been told no, and firmly, as he had asked several times. after sulking out of the room and thinking about it for a minute, he returned to tell us that "I will just say sorry later..." ugh

CL's Blessing

We blessed CL the day after the reception in l'burg since so much of my family was already in town. Johns parents drove down to be there, and stef and her boys came down from Roanoke. It was such a wonderful day! I am so grateful for the family that was able to make the trip and be there with us, and we really missed those who could not.
My mom made her dress, and it was the same one I wore when I was blessed (28 years ago... YIKES!!!) and she looked beautiful in the white dress.... SIDE NOTE: my mom entered this dress into a contest and won best in show as well as best in the baby category in the chesterfield county fair in 1980.. the embroidery covers a lot of the dress, and it is BEAUTIFUL! my mom rocks!
I see a lot of my mom in CL, and I am so grateful my mom has talents I can only dream about. She passed on a box of my embroidered baby/toddler clothes for CL... i feel like I have been waiting for so long to put these on a kid!

John, CL, and Amy

Our whole crazy family...and the baby sleeps through it all!

My brother nate had to work, so he sent his girlfriend Tara in his place. She is so awesome, and i was glad she came! Johns mom
made it just in time, and brought Lisa and her mom with her. Grandma Haren had never met CL or Van, so I was really glad she could come! Stephanie came with her super cute boys, Jack and Alex, as well as her bro and sis in laws, Catherine and Todd... it is such a small world, as Catherine turned out to be my little sisters RA at college...

After the blessing, we headed to my parents house for some lunch. It was so fun to have my whole family together for the weekend, and it was great having a bit of Johns family be able to join us for the special day!

Alex, Stephanie, and Jack

4 generations!






Lyndsay and Tara